It has been 4 months since I have come here. Here, in UPES, amidst the scenic beauty of Dehradun. A beautiful university. I got a room in a hostel—Spire Home—great rooms with great facilities. Mumma and Papa helped me to get the things settled in the room. Time passed and finally they had to leave…leave me all alone here. As soon as I hugged my father, I cried like a small girl who has lost her favorite doll though she never thought that one day she would lose it. I held him tight, as if I would never let him go away, the best moment. He unwillingly pushed me away and went out of the room. He didn’t want to go, I could see that but he went away. I know why. My mother kept herself strong and started telling me the DOs and the DON’Ts, which I guess each girl would have listened to.
The next day I got up early as I live in triple sharing with only 1 washroom. Yes, pathetic it is but I was more compassionate about my other two roomies. I gulped the breakfast and ran to catch the bus and yes, I was lucky. Reached the college and the classes started, the hectic schedule which continues till today, 10:30 a.m-05:30p.m. The routine is still the same, no changes, but what changed, hurt me a lot.
Oops!! I forgot to mention about my friends. The first day was something I can never forget, a memorable day, the campus was buzzing with enthusiasm of the fresher.
But as time fleeted, groups were being made. Later, I too had my own group of friends, my life. We enjoyed a lot and time maintained its course and we wrote our first mid-sem exam—went HOME—enjoyed the Diwali with family, and came back.
I heard that as time changes people also change, and this thing happened with me too. I don’t know whether I had a problem with myself or they had changed but what I know is that their behavior towards me had changed.
I know I am too possessive. When I give my 100 percent, I want the same from the people I give my hundred percent to, and well this is my nature which I cannot change and do not want to change. I don’t know whether people like this or not. Earlier I used to tell them my problem but now I don’t even find any person to tell anything. I feel very lonely and now I don’t know or I can’t even see myself to stay here for 4 more years. It seems so IMPOSSIBLE.
